Love me like you donut

Hello. Thank you  for dropping by. I have been thinking a lot lately about love,not for the beauty it brings,or the glory associated to it but the other side. The side which isn't bubbly. Don't be tempted to think this post is about hate. I love donuts,I love biscuits,I love basketball. All the above are not on a level ground though. I  can play basketball anytime any day as long as I have a ball. Biscuits are my favourite all time snack. Donuts have great looks and taste to match. I would choose biscuits over  them, not to mean I have stopped loving them.

 A few years ago,in my highschool days I had this friend that I loved dearly but I didn't know . I longed to see her,I stared at her and protected her a lot. She wasn't as outgoing as I was. But was like me in many ways,from our very wide smile, to the love for literature and poetry. She loved donuts more than I did. 
My school was close to a natural forest. During prep time and most part of the day we had this biting cold companion. That wasn't my favourite type of weather,neither was it hers. Other times when the cold was too much she would cry and being at loss I'd cry too. If you know me well,you must be really surprised. I don't look anything like the melting emotional type of person. Our conversations were brief. Sometimes a flash of our twin smiles and raised eyebrows was all we had to exchange.
I complained to my diary about her. How her indifference and moodswings made me feel. How she didn't love me like I loved her. How her care wasn't far stretching as mine. How donuts meant a lot to her more than I did. Looking back at those complaints I can't help but laugh out loud.I was jealous at nonliving things-food. I saw her laugh so heartily during group discussion and some sort of hunger gripped my stomach. It had been such a while since I had seen her that happy. Then my over thinking showed up,I hadn't made her happy,that happy ever. Then I thought I should get her donuts. 

We are often tempted to think that we are better loved how we are not,you have no idea how much sense that made in my head. I hope it lands with the same vigour. It's human. Love me like you do not. Instead of finding joy in what we have,what we're given,we get all worked up for what we fail to get. We ignore plain and question deeply the hidden things.

Now I am older and I think she loved me her way. I was too naive to see or accept that back then. I have learnt that one can love deeply in different  ways. Like every other natural emotion,love has no manual. You can love your donuts and still love your biscuits. The balance is not assured but the underlying emotion is the same. Before you think you're unloved,or unappreciated think of my friend and donuts. She loves you her way,do not think it's the donut way. Enjoy a donut soon.

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